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destiny, dreams, illusions 23 November 2004

Posted by Sasha in Mood Notes, Philosophy & Paradox, The Brooder.
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what is my destiny..?

i’ve been searching for clues… deciphering signs… knowing and cultivating my talents… and yet i still ask, “what will become of it?” does anyone really know what they’re meant to do? or are they merely making do with what they have? is there a specific point that you’ll reach in your life where you’d come to a realisation of that elusive destiny?

“to realise one’s destiny is a person’s only obligation.”

what of other factors? are they considered trivial? or add-ons? or luxury?

i know what i wanna do but unlike everything else, time is an integral part. some stumble into the actual dream that i have, without any real interest or passion, so they end up wasting it. and yet here am i, dying to get a piece of it, if only the forces would allow me… that they’d give me that ONE chance to show them my passion for it… what i can actually do…

my problem is NOT indecisiveness.

but being someone who knows what she wants and who’s not willing to sell herself short of the dream.

PERFECTIONIST. ALL-or-nothing kind. seems impressive yet some mistake it for mere confidence or arrogance. and i have seen it as a hindrance now.

i already know what i want to do… so is that realising my destiny? if it is, then i have done or fulfilled my obligation, haven’t i? but somehow i know i haven’t fully realised my dream cuz it hasn’t happened yet.

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